Wednesday, March 21, 2012


Friday, July 15, 2011


Following are quotables from “Real Time with Bill Maher” for Friday, July 15, 2011. “Real Time with Bill Maher” airs Fridays at 10:00PM ET (10:00PM PT, tape delayed) on HBO, with additional replays throughout the week on HBO and HBO 2.

I understand the Republican’s frustration. They came in pretending to negotiate. The least Obama could do would be to pretend to listen
- Bill Maher, in his opening monologue

We are having in this country, America, supposedly a first world nation, an argument about whether we should pay our bills. And the Republicans - the conservative party - says no. Paying bills is for squares, man. That whole "money" thing is a trap. Their economic plan is like, we hitchhike to a Phish concert. And if we get a ride from a trucker and he asks us to chip in for gas, we'll just give him a hand job.
- Bill Maher, in his opening monologue

I think I know now why we are occupying Iraq. In case we have to sell America and move to a smaller country.
- Bill Maher, in his opening monologue, regarding the debt crisis

This weekend they are closing a ten mile stretch of the 405 freeway. And Apparently this is the most logistically complicated construction project to happen in LA since Heidi Montag got her ass, chin, neck, boobs and nose done at the same time.
- Bill Maher regarding “Carmageddon”
The Republicans seem bound and determined to drive the country off the cliff fiscally because they see no downside in it for them ... The “R’s” want to run on, “Are you better off now than you were four years ago.” And they want to pin the recession, pin the economic collapse, on Obama. And really claim, you know, “it’s the economy, stupid.” And I think Americans are going to need to be reminded that it’s “It’s Stupid’s economy still.” George Bush drove the economy off the cliff.
- Dan Savage

The ideology, they’re narrow minded, they’re shameless, they’re bullies, they’re full of ignorant rage. And that’s very satisfying to stupid people.
- Mark Maron regarding the success of right wing talk radio

What’s the difference between Rupert Murdoch and Larry Flynt?
- Bill Maher

New Rule: Now that the social network "Google +" has arrived expressly to try and destroy Facebook and Twitter the way Facebook and Twitter blew away MySpace right after MySpace obliterated Friendster the Internet must admit that it doesn't really understand the concept of "friendship."
- Bill Maher, in his “New Rules” segment

New Rule: If you drugged your husband, tied him to the bed, and cut off his penis, you don't have to then throw the penis in the garbage disposal. I think you made your point at "cut off his penis." Come on, Tiger Mom. You got him. There's no need to spike the balls.
- Bill Maher, in his “New Rules” segment

This week's guests were Mark Cuban, Chrystia Freeland, Dan Savage, Dr. Colin Campbell and Marc Maron.