Friday, May 15th, 2009
QUOTES FROM “REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER"
Following are quotables from “Real Time with Bill Maher” for Friday, May 15th, 2009. “Real Time with Bill Maher” airs Fridays at 10:00PM ET (10:00PM PT, tape delayed) on HBO, with additional replays throughout the week on HBO and HBO 2.
Republicans keep changing their story on torture. First it was, "We didn't torture," then it became, "OK, we tortured, but it worked," now it's "Nancy Pelosi said we could."
- Bill Maher in his opening monologue
Newt Gingrich yesterday was all over TV. He called Nancy Pelosi a frivolous politician. Pretty strong words from a guy who goes on CNN just to swipe food from the green room.
- Bill Maher in his opening monologue
Sarah Palin said the liberal onslaught of malicious attacks against Miss California is despicable. And then she said, “I feel like you are my own daughter.”
- Bill Maher in his opening monologue
New Rule: Stop having the same discussion every year about whether the comedian at the Correspondents' Dinner went "too far." This week, conservatives were outraged that the president laughed - out loud - at a black, lesbian woman. You think you're pissed now? Wait'll he appoints her to the Supreme Court.
- Bill Maher in his “New Rules” segment
New Rule: Instead of killing 99.9% of germs, Lysol has to just go ahead and kill them all. Why spare the remaining .1%? So they can return to their villages and tell the other germs, "Dude, do not mess with Lysol."
- Bill Maher in his “New Rules” segment
New Rule: Just because something isn't endangered anymore doesn't mean we have to go back to killing it. There are still only 6000 gray wolves. They're not a threat unless Pakistan sells them nukes. You want to hunt a species that's breeding out of control? How about that "Jon & Kate Plus 8."
- Bill Maher in his “New Rules” segment
This week's guests were Richard Brookhiser, Amy Holmes, Dan Savage, David Simon and Elizabeth Warren.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
278 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 278 of 278As I suspected......
Stupid comeback with no debate on the issue.
Oops...
Sorry, I left something out of my last post.
**...ya' Stupid Cunt!**
"Stupid comeback with no debate on the issue...."
What's to Debate you ignorant fuck?
I'm in total agreement with you!
Obama was NOT born here and never bothered to become a U.S. citizen!
This is your contention...
...correct?
No debate from me.
Unless you're saying the Republicunts aren't a bunch of powerless pussies, made the bitches of *The Kenyon*!
But if you disagree with me on the Pussiness of the Republicunts, then WHY AREN'T THEY DOING SOMETHING ABOUT THAT NO COUNT NIGGER THAT IS IN THE WHITE HOUSE ILLEGALLY!
...Stupid Cunt!
No, then you're the Stupid and "Racist" Cunt!
Based on our Laws...
You must be a citizen of this country to run for President Moron!
Hellooooo?
Oh, I forgot. Your side hates Bush so bad you would elect Osama Bin Laden for President!
I'm not sure why, but this current turn of events, with *The Kenyon* and all, remind me of an old Godfrey Cambridge movie called 'The Watermelon Man.'
Great movie...
***ugga-booga-dooga-do...
...I am getting whiter and whiter***
"Based on our Laws...
You must be a citizen of this country to run for President Moron!
..."
Guess what, you ignorant fuck?
To be president of this country, "based on our laws" you have to have been BORN in this country.
So, if *The Kenyon* was indeed born in Kenya, he is in the White House ILLEGALLY AND THE FUCKING REPUBLICUNTS ARE TOO PUSSIFIED AND OWNED BY THE KENYON TO DO JACK SHIT ABOUT IT!
Is any of this sinking in through your very thick skull?
...ya' Dumb Cunt!
My God, who is the Stupid one? Explains everything....Stupid is as Stupid does!
Arnold "can't" run!
What does that tell you idiot?
Zenny so stupidly said:
So, if *The Kenyon* was indeed born in Kenya, he is in the White House ILLEGALLY AND THE FUCKING REPUBLICUNTS ARE TOO PUSSIFIED AND OWNED BY THE KENYON TO DO JACK SHIT ABOUT IT!
Where the hell have you been?
Now me, I don't care that *The Kenyon* wasn't born here.
I'd rather have a Wet Back from Africa with Hussein in his name, than that fossil, turned Bush's bitch, McCain, givin' the White House that old man smell.
But anyway, if you Republicunts are going to take the legal road to have that illegal evicted from the White House you guys better do it now, before he loads the Supreme Court with a bunch of P.R.'s.
Because everyone knows P.R.'s hate Republicans almost as much as they hate Mexicans.
Hola chingon
Tu amigo Obama need a birth certificate? I set him up real good, with birth certificate & green card & driver license an' all that. Give me a call and I hook you up. I'll show you mine too.
See, I got this friend in the llegada...
Call me 202 456-1414. Say "Why is the DEA is still raiding my house?" so I know its you.
"Where the hell have you been?..."
Right here watching you powerless little bitches crying because Obama is in the White House illegally...
...and you can't do anything about it.
If I'm wrong here, please be so kind as to show me where I went off the track.
...ya' Stupid Cunt!
Hmmm...
Never noticed *that* before.
I was just looking at the photos I took of me and Obama fucking those white women, off the Oval Office, when I took a closer look at his Kenyon birth certificate.
Fucker's first name is Hitler!
Hitler Hussein Obama!
**Can I get a HHO!**
...and the birth certificate lists his *actual* daddy's name as, *Kill Whitie* with a last name that's unpronounceable, with a lot of clicks and buzzing noises in it.
Zenny,
You are just one example as to how what you hate the most will come back to bite you in your ass!
Have you ever thought about using the little brains you sit on or do they know nothing but vulgarities and stupidity?
For once, I would love to read something viable from you and have yet to find it!
"Zenny,
You are just one example as to how what you hate the most will come back to bite you in your ass!
Have you ever thought about using the little brains you sit on or do they know nothing but vulgarities and stupidity?
For once, I would love to read something viable from you and have yet to find it!..."
STAY ON TOPIC GOD DAMN IT!
...ya' Stupid Cunt!
Damn!
Syd the Shid crawled back under his rock, right when things started getting interesting...
I "was" on Topic you fat ass!
You're the one who keeps posting this crap as you usually do without any facts or sense to back it up!
Well...
If you're just going to lose it and flail out every which way, then I'm done with you!
Come back after you've calmed down, or your meds kick in.
What are the qualification of president?
An age of 35, resident of the US for 14 years and a natural born citizen.
If he was born in Hawaii? Prove it...If he's not hiding anything?
Case closed!
So typical Zenny, avoiding the issues...
Who looks like the asshole? You did exactly as expected.....
Couldn't logically answer!
I believe that most on here who believe as you must be slapping their heads right now as to how stupid you make them look!
I don't care what you call me or how you feel about my beliefs but, I, at least try to answer what you accuse!
You don't know me (and I know you have searched Twitter for this name but, Surprise!...I'm no idiot as you believe!
"If he was born in Hawaii? Prove it...If he's not hiding anything?
Case closed!..."
Geeze, you are one thick bitch.
I'm in total agreement with you!
Obama isn't releasing his birth certificate, because it's from Kenya!
He is indeed *The Kenyon* from the great Black continent of Africa!
But for the grace of god, he doesn't have rings on his elongated neck and uncomfortable plates in his lips, living in a mud hut, hunting monkeys in trees with poisoned darts, who has never held anything more valuable in his hands than a dead monkey or a clump of dirt!
But, he's our president!
And I'm totally fine with all of that!
I'm also laughing myself silly at the impotent Republicunts, buzzing like bees because an *illegal* took over the White House and they are powerless to do ANYTHING other than piss and moan about it, while he loads the Supreme Court with P.R.'s and practicing abortion doctors.
"Surprise!...I'm no idiot as you believe!..."
The only way *that* could be true, is if you're an even bigger idiot that I suspect.
Keep going Zenny....I love my case even more everytime you touch that keyboard.
Are all of you that "stupid"?
Oh and, Viagra, ExTenze..all kind of products to help you find it.
Oh Shit!!!
I think I finally broke the Stupid Cunt!
"Are all of you that "stupid"?..."
Looking for a little support 'eh?
I'm guessin' right about now, you're feelin' like you do when you have that dream, where you're at school giving a report to the class and suddenly notice that you're all naked!
Everyone's lookin'...
...and nobody's all that impressed, ya' stupid cunt.
***Ca-tho-lic girrls
with their tiny little mustache*** --F. Zappa
ZenGrouch said...
Oh Shit!!!
I think I finally broke the Stupid Cunt!
How in the hell do you think you "broke" me? I'm not bowing down to you!
Come on Zenny...Gotta be quicker than that....
No time for thinking in the world we live in now!
You're such an asshole!
I've been reading about someone's quest for a birth certificate. One day I was stopped by the police and he asked me for some ID. I said I had none. He said that's not possible.. I said of course it's possible. cause I don't have any. You don't require and ID to exist.. He said sure you do. things like this make me think that too many people in positions of authority are just to dumb. for I had no ID and in fact do exist. Although I am female I don't like to carry a purse so my ID is in the bottom of my closet in a purse, my drivers licence is usually in my glove compartment as I only need it when I drive. ID.. why do we need it any way. We know who we are.
Just something to think about
Gypsy
Ever hear the saying you argue with an idiot long enough, you become one.. I am wondering if anyone here expects to be taken seriously? Or is this a forum of fool's debate?
Open forums can be used as a means of changing government, opinions. But like the boy who cried wolf, if one persists on pushing the bull, when an issue of great concern comes about. People won't be listening.
Gypsy
We are so brain washed by the way things are run. Not just the little guy.. everyone. the rich think they are better because they are rich, and we think we are less because we are not. The purpose of money is to facilitate the exchange of goods and services, not to be better than someone.
Here is an example of how people could work together to change things.
big automobile companies are shutting down. a lot of people are going out of work, along the way some were forced into retirement by age, retirement comes with a pension.
You can work for something like that without learning about the industry. So you make building cars a hoby. When you get something that works team up with your municipal government, as a partner. It creates local jobs, income potential, benefits of lowering taxes, because the municipal government would get a real long term income. When the whole community benefits, people stand behind it more. It doesn,t have to take money to make money. Saving money is also using money wisely.
Thinking like this breaks down big monopolies. Which is good business.
Gypsy
"I am wondering if anyone here expects to be taken seriously? Or is this a forum of fool's debate?..."
Being taken seriously is WAY overrated!
And I have a sneaking suspicion that you just might equate "being taken seriously" with "expecting to change anyone's opinion."
That ain't gonna happen here.
But if you despise Bush, his supporters and those who think he and Ronnie "Poopie Pants" Reagan are just *Swell* guys as much as I do, this is a fun place to blow off a little steam, while making the opposition look as stupid as you believe them to be.
"You can work for something like that without learning about the industry. So you make building cars a hoby..."
Thanks for the vision of 'The Little Rascals' hurling down a steep hill, at the mercy of gravity and a broken stick rubbing against a baby buggy wheel, in a wooden death trap, straight into a busy intersection.
This would be a more merciful and less humiliating way to spend one's time, than trying to invent a car and team up with your local government to produce the thing.
"You're such an asshole!..."
***LISTEN TO YOUR FILTHY MOUTH, YA FUCKIN WHORE!*** --Beverly R. Sutphin
Ball Licker states:
But if you despise Bush, his supporters and those who think he and Ronnie "Poopie Pants" Reagan are just *Swell* guys as much as I do, this is a fun place to blow off a little steam, while making the opposition look as stupid as you believe them to be...
Except that is your one trick pony and strawman all wrapped into one, Ball Licker. You see I have never defended Bush, Reagan, or the GOP. It is your witch hunt and insanity that brings those subjects into your lunatic comments ALL THE TIME. You're just a dumb fucking psychotic idiot that fancies himself enlightened. How pathetic must your position be that you need to constantly bring in the "boogey men" into it? Pretty fucking pathetic, like you.
"You see I have never defended Bush, Reagan, or the GOP..."
I guess I should have added **assholes in general** to my list!
Yeah, no ties to the GOP, or the Republicunts at all!
Yet you come thisssss close to claiming that Obama wasn't born in the U.S.
But you don't have the balls to come out and make a declarative statement one way or the other!
PUSSY!!!
Typical Republicunt tactics!
Throw a little shit on the wall, then, if it sticks, wait and see if Jesus appears to you, in the form of Rush!
So douche bag, did the press pay for their own plane, and are you too stupid to admit that 2 small jets would cost MUCH less to take a trip in than a fucking 747?
You are so plastic...
OK, with all the Stupid Cunts here...
...isn't it sad that everyone would know who I'm talking about when I say:
***PUS-SAY!!!***
Those are the "only" words your mind knows!
It sure doesn't know anything else!
:)
When you settled on the name *Independent Thinker* that was just wishful thinking... right?
If you ever expressed an original thought here, I just might have a heart attack.
**...thought I'd give you something to shoot for**
Oh, and those aren't the only words I know.
They're are my favorite words, however, when dealing with the likes of you!
Frankie said it best in this interview on CrossFire from way back...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ISil7IHzxc
What happened to that slippery little Syd the Squid?
Blast a little ink, and scoot away!
...PUS*SAY!!!
ZenGrouch said...
When you settled on the name *Independent Thinker* that was just wishful thinking... right?
If you ever expressed an original thought here, I just might have a heart attack.
**...thought I'd give you something to shoot for**
Well, after seeing you, my help may not be needed! I think you will be able to do it yourself!
"Well, after seeing you, my help may not be needed! I think you will be able to do it yourself!..."
I'll bet you hear something eerily familiar to that, 2 minutes into every blind date you ever been on...
http://dlisted.com/node/32335
Being taken seriously is WAY overrated!
So what you are saying is that this isn't a place for sane people or sound minds to discuss anything of value.
"So what you are saying is that this isn't a place for sane people or sound minds to discuss anything of value..."
Sure... why not?
...umm, but what's any of *that* got to do with you?
Zenny,
For once, I would love for you to name "one" promise Obama has kept!
Just the facts man!
He got a dog but, not a shelter dog!
And, he can quote the Koran!
"Just the facts man!..."
Fact is...
If you can't come up with an answer to that one on your own, you're a bigger Dumb Cunt than even *I* suspected!
Congratulations!
...ya' stupid bitch
There you are! I was getting worried and bored!
But, answering the question would make you look better!
Come on Zenny,
ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!
But, we all know you will avoid it by calling me the names you so love!
Does your wife know you call other women those names just because you don't like their views....
but, she is married to you...God help her!
"ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!..."
Demanding AND a Stupid Cunt?!
*YOU* must be what they refer to as, "The Entire Package!!!"
***VA-VA-VA-VOOM!***
Oh My God!
You just proved how stupid you are and what a total jerk of an asshole that comes with it!
You didn't answer the question!
"You didn't answer the question!..."
Yeah...
I'll get to that later.
But first, answer me this one...
***How do you keep a Stupid Cunt in suspense?***
ZenGrouch said...
"You didn't answer the question!..."
Yeah...
I'll get to that later.
What's the hold up? It's been over 100 Days!
Do you have to research? Find something that he's done?
Shouldn't take but 2 seconds cuz he ain't done shit except put our asses in debt and bow to the "terrorist" .... ooops, I said a bad word but, they "loved" him yesterday!!!!
hmmmm....
How do you keep a Stupid Cunt in Suspense?
Let me think....Oh, I got it...marry Zenny and try to find his weenie!
"What's the hold up?..."
What's the hurry?
Besides, show me your's first and answer a simple question!
***HOW do you keep a Stupid Cunt in suspense?***
"Let me think....Oh, I got it...marry Zenny and try to find his weenie!..."
Not bad! Not bad at all!
Hey, give Obama some time.
You think he can make Kenya the 51st state overnight?
That should shut those assholes up, who demand to see his birth certificate...
ZenGrouch said...
"What's the hold up?..."
What's the hurry?
Besides, show me your's first and answer a simple question!
***HOW do you keep a Stupid Cunt in suspense?***
Let me see...You've been on this site since "way" before the God took office so, don't think hurry is the issue.
Now, the show me your's first? Why would I be asking you? Because I haven't seen anything yet from the Anointed One!
I already answered the "How do you keep a Stupid Cunt in suspense" question.
Ask your wife!
Crap....you actually posted fast this time....
Now I have to respond to your latter post....
Don't do that!
Now Zenny, I am in no way disrespecting your wife (which, I can't for the life of me think that you would think I were since you call me the worst name in the book) but, just wanted to verify that for the record!
Hey Bill....Put me and Zenny on your show!!!!!
"I am in no way disrespecting your wife..."
Not a problem...
So don't mistake my silence for contempt.
It's late...
Good night.
If you were God how would you save your creation? People that is, the ones I made in my image? Would you make them believe in you or would you let them choose? Things were perfect for a little while, but then man sinned. How would you reach out to people?
Hey Maher you little twerp dickhead with no balls - how about you and your nigger friend DL Hughly (jiggerboo who should be shot)go jump in a boat and head over to the Middle East and get your stupid gay butts blown up! Running down Ronald Reagan, a great American president who did not have to be a nigger to get elected by you jackasses. I hope you know Maher, their IS a contract out on you, Hughly, and CHris Rock and all of your friends. And I can't WAIT until we see you dead gay twerp, girlfriend beating ass on a slab at the morgue where they can just throw it into a crap bin and discard it with the other trash. TWERP - NIGGER LOVER-watch out for the KKK!
Ronald Reagan... Great American president?!
That pants shitting, cock sucking daughter fucking, lying ass hole should have been sent to prison for life, for his acts of treason in interfering with our kidnap victims in Iraq, by dealing with terrorists in order to win the election against Carter.
If there really was a god, Reagan and Bush's daddy would have been ass raped to death by big black bucks in the shower.
But in reality, if the dynamic duo were sent to prison for treason, they would probably die from old age there, rather than ass rape...
They proved themselves so good at making deals with the scum of the Earth, they would have worked something out where they would prove to be more valuable as live cocksuckers servicing EVERYONE, rather than dead rape victims in the prison shower...
I would like to see a panel discuss the fact that while we know George Bush is a scum bag, he simply got caught doing things presidents have been doing for decades. Nixon wire taped. Regan sold weapons to "the terrorists" and while I loved Clinton, I am sure he was "business as usual" like every other president but the difference is gas prices were down, people had jobs - initially -and when the people aren't "hurting" they don't care about stuff like Abu Ghraib. After all, Guantanamo wasn't built over night
love ur show osama is a ghost millions on a mans head cant find him bs lookin 4 santa 2 lol
In 1997 NORAD said they insure, "Aircraft flying over our air space are monitored seven days a week, 24 hours a day."
In 2004 the Air Force contradictorily said, "Before 2001, 1st Air Force was charged with keeping an eye on the nation’s borders, usually looking for threats in the form of Russian aircraft skirting too close for comfort to the mainland. In those few hours, the command’s mission went from looking outward to looking inward."
See the 5 articles on NORAD at www.DNotice.org
In 1997 NORAD said they insure, "Aircraft flying over our air space are monitored seven days a week, 24 hours a day."
In 2004 the Air Force contradictorily said, "Before 2001, 1st Air Force was charged with keeping an eye on the nation’s borders, usually looking for threats in the form of Russian aircraft skirting too close for comfort to the mainland. In those few hours, the command’s mission went from looking outward to looking inward."
See the 5 articles on NORAD at www.DNotice.org
In 1997 NORAD said they insure, "Aircraft flying over our air space are monitored seven days a week, 24 hours a day."
In 2004 the Air Force contradictorily said, "Before 2001, 1st Air Force was charged with keeping an eye on the nation’s borders, usually looking for threats in the form of Russian aircraft skirting too close for comfort to the mainland. In those few hours, the command’s mission went from looking outward to looking inward."
See the 5 articles on NORAD at www.DNotice.org
I am thoroughly convinced in this said post. I am currently searching for ways in which I could enhance my knowledge in this said topic you have posted here. It does help me a lot knowing that you have shared this information here freely. I love the way the people here interact and shared their opinions too. I would love to track your future posts pertaining to the said topic we are able to read.
This is the perfect blog for anyone who wants to know about this topic. You know so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I really would want...HaHa). You definitely put a new spin on a subject thats been written about for years. Great stuff, just great!
cara beriklan di internet | cara beriklan di internet | cara beriklan di internet | cara beriklan di internet | CARA BERIKLAN DI INTERNET | cara beriklan di internet | CARA BERIKLAN DI INTERNET | cara beriklan di internet
Websasdesign.com Cinta Blogger
Gogo2011 Kobamusaji
IdeGue! Blog
Websasdesign.com Cinta Blogger
Pulse Yahoo
Banyak diantara kita yang mungkin sudah tahu bahwa penyakit ini memalukan dan bisa membuat penderitanya menjadi frustasi Penderita kadang merasa enggan melakukan pemeriksaan karena Mereka dapat muncul secara sendiri-sendiri atau berkelompok. kutil dapat muncul pada rektum dan daerah sekitarnya.membayangkan dokter yang akan melihat organ kelaminya Tapi ingatlah bahwa faktor malu itu yang bisa menjadikankan penyakit anda ini semakin lebih serius. Misalnya dengan munculnya rasa gatal-gatal pada daerah yang terinfeksi.
Post a Comment